She stood by her man — despite the black eye and the court order of protection.

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Some crimes of opportunity knock and others walk right up to the window.

The female defendant looks professional, smartly attired and dressed to impress. She is a voluntary surrender. She woke this morning knowing exactly where she was going.

She worked for the Port Authority and in that capacity had access to all sorts of personal information on a host of customers and employees.

The prosecutor lists the charges including identity theft and possession of a forged instrument. He also says that the woman netted more than $8,000 through her crimes.

The defense takes objection to that figure, claiming the proceeds are closer to $2,100.

This woman stole private information, created bogus accounts on which she drafted bogus checks. The risks, the efforts, the sneaking, the worry and the hassle: all for a net gain somewhere between two and eight grand.

She arrived in court voluntarily, so the judge figures she is a good bet: He releases her on her own recognizance.

As the defendant was being arrested, he told the officers, "I know I'm not supposed to go to her apartment. I signed an order of protection."

That was crime and confession all in one basket, but the defendant volunteered this information in the hopes of avoiding the very place he now stands.

"I went to talk to her dad about why I couldn't see my babies. I thought it was easier than court," he says.

With no priors and such raw concern for his kids, the defense feels he should be released on his own recognizance.

However, one person's concern is another's blatant disregard for process and orders. The prosecutor asks for $1,000 bail.

The judge takes a long moment to read the case file, and before he lifts his head he can be heard, "Wait, wait, wait."

"No priors? His sheet shows he did 10 months for third-degree rape."

Silence from both sides.

"Am I the only one reading this?" the judge continues, anger rising. "And the complaining witness in that case is the same in this case! Did you take that into account?!"

The prosecutor emerges from the flurry of papers she is madly perusing: "Well, your honor, taking that into account, the prosecution requests $5,000."

And $5,000 bail it is.

A cooling hot fashion trend is wearing low-cut jeans very low, low enough to show the bands of thong underwear.

This look commonly belongs to the female domain, but this evening, a young man steps before the judge in skin-tight black jeans slung low enough to show off his black thong.

The top half of his ensemble is a red-hooded sweatshirt, bright red. The hoodie was a size or three too small and he wears no shirt underneath.

He spent the evening dancing at a hot spot in west Chelsea. Some sort of tussle erupted on the dancefloor and the defendant turned and punched the first person he saw.

The bouncers showed him the door head first, and when he picked himself up and dusted off, he continued to throw his fists in every direction.

Three additional individuals felt his wrath before cops subdued and arrested him.

His only defense, "I wanted to hit the person who punched me."

By process of elimination.

The judgment: Released with a future court date.

With clubbed-out duds, but a dorky demeanor, tonight's defendant comes directly from night club to night court.

According to the prosecution, the argument started in the club verbally, but "the fight became greater."

Eventually, the defendant stabbed his fellow reveler.

In addition, the background check on him produced an open weapons warrant.

"Do you know anything about that?" the judge inquires to the prosecution.

"I know everything about that, your honor," the defense attorney confidently volunteers.

"I am not addressing you," comes the judge's chilly response.

Despite the prosecution's insistence, the defense claims the warrant does not match because the defendant has no tattoos, has never been to West Virginia and is a U.S. citizen.

"Your honor," the slick defender schmoozes, "the whole incident, up to and including the stabbing, was self-defense. The only reason my client is here is because of that fraudulent warrant. I insist on ROR."

The prosecution suggests $1500. The judge, unswayed by all, hands down a bail of $3500.