ST. GEORGE, Utah — A woman wiped away tears on the witness stand Friday as she described the "horror and despair" she felt the night before her arranged marriage to a first cousin conducted by polygamist leader Warren Jeffs.

"I kept thinking that I was getting ready for death," testified the woman, who was 14 years old when prosecutors allege Jeffs coerced her into marrying and having sex with a 19-year-old cousin in the Fundamentalist Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints (FLDS). "I felt trapped and betrayed."

Lawyers for Jeffs, 51, claim he never told her to unwillingly submit to sex with her husband. Jeffs says he counseled her in a manner consistent with the beliefs of the FLDS, which teaches women that a life in service to their husband will lead them to the "celestial kingdom" of heaven.

On the witness stand Friday, the woman identified a photo of herself sullenly modeling her white wedding dress, as well as other pictures documenting what she described as a loveless marriage built on her fear of eternal damnation.

"My life revolved around that ceremony. In that society, it's what we live for. It's what we keep ourselves clean for," the witness said, as several of Jeffs' followers, including three women, listened to the testimony in the gallery with their heads bowed. "He was my ticket into heaven. If I was not a good priesthood wife, I would not go to heaven."

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A few days before the April 23, 2001, wedding, the woman said, she met with Jeffs' father, Rulon Jeffs, the leader and prophet of the FLDS at the time, to try to convince him to change his mind.

"I didn't want to defy him, but I was asking for at least two more years, or to find someone who wasn't my cousin," the woman, now 21, testified before a packed courtroom audience.

She said she explained her position to Rulon Jeffs, the prophet of her faith, who patted her on the hand and told her to "follow your heart, sweetie," before sending her away.

"I was so relieved because it was as though someone was finally listening to me," she said of Rulon Jeffs.

Also present at the meeting was Warren Jeffs, the prophet's first counselor in the FLDS "priesthood," who allegedly had a different interpretation of the discussion. After the meeting, the alleged victim said that Jeffs told her that her heart "was in the wrong place," and that the marriage would go forward.

Two days later, the woman testified, she and her cousin stood before Jeffs in a Nevada hotel owned by FLDS members. The witness said she cried as Jeffs held their hands together and told them to "go forth and multiply and replenish the earth with good priesthood children."

She said she returned home that evening to find a queen-sized bed decorated with flowers in the place that had once been occupied by two twin beds for her and sister.

Jurors viewed a picture of the new bride hiding her face in her hands as the groom carried her across the threshold, where a "honeymoon hideout" banner hung over the doorway.

The woman explained that she was hiding her tears from family members who were documenting the occasion.

"Everyone around me was telling me that I'd done the right thing, that I should be happy, that [my husband] wasn't so bad, it was okay that he was my cousin," the witness recalled.

The couple did not consummate their marriage that evening, and as time went on, the woman said her feelings for her husband worsened as he attempted to coax her into sexual relations.

The witness did not say on the stand that her husband forced her to have sex. She said that he would try to touch her in places that made her uncomfortable and once sent her running to her mother by exposing his genitals to her.

Dressed in a long gray skirt and blazer, the woman tearfully testified that she continued resisting her husband's sexual advances during their honeymoon. After he moved in with her, she often spent nights in her mother's room to avoid contact with him.

The woman said she had no idea what to expect the night her husband told her it was time for her "to be a wife" and submit to sexual relations after more than two months of marriage.

"My whole entire body was shaking, I was so scared," the woman testified through sobs. "I said to [him], 'I really don't know what you're doing and I'm real uncomfortable. Please stop.'"

In addition to the physical pain that resulted from the encounter, the woman said the experience left her feeling "evil" and suicidal.

On the advice of her sisters, she decided to seek counsel from Jeffs once again in the hopes that he would "release" her from the marriage.

"He told me that I needed to go home and repent," the woman said as Jeffs, dressed in a dark suit and tie, watched her testify. "He said I was not living up to my vows, I was not being submissive to my priesthood head, and that was what my problem was."

She left the FLDS community in 2004.

Jeffs' lawyers will question the woman when the trial resumes Monday morning.